Tonight I Cried

Tonight... I cried.

I sat in Elsie's room, I held her, and I cried.
I cried because she's no longer a little baby.
I cried because we're leaving the house that I brought her home to.
I cried because my days with just her are numbered.
I cried because she won't always let me hold her this way.
I cried because I'm scared.

I'm scared that I won't love my little boy as much as I love my little girl.
I'm scared because we're leaving home.
I'm scared of what the future holds.
I'm scared because I worry.

I worry that my kids will grow up and grow apart.
I worry that things won't be okay.
I worry that I won't be the mom my kids need.
I worry about what the world is becoming.
I worry because I'm human.

photo by Cleo Creative Photography and Design

12 comments:

Unknown said...

Love you!! You're an amazing mother and those kids will love you forever.

Amy G said...

BThaiful! Record your feelings like this for each of your children <3 You will treasure them.

I loved baby number five as much as number one. The capacity of our heart is amazing and, fortunately, it seems the more love we fill it with, the less other things matter. Things that really didn't need to be as important as they were. :)

My siblings and I are very close, enough that we still fight sometimes. Lol

As far as the world goes... I pray they are strong enough to be a light in the darkness.

Amy G said...

Beautiful!** No idea what happened there ;)

Anonymous said...

BECAUSE you worry, you are an amazing mother. I, too, worry about things I can do nothing about - and it drives me crazy!!!!! You are a beautiful lady inside & out and even though we do not know each other personally, I do know that you will be okay :)

Why Girls Are Weird said...

Oh Alyx this brought tears to my eyes! You are an AMAZING mother.

Mia @ The Chronicles of Chaos said...

Alyx, I was so happy to see that you posted! And what a beautiful post it is. I used to worry about the same thing when I was pregnant with my second - what if my heart can only give so much? But I promise you, you will be so consumed with love for both of them, you will look back and wonder why you were even worried. :) You're a great mama!

Genna said...

I'm not even a parent yet and I have these fears. It's hard and the struggle with not being enough is constant. I'll be thinking of you and praying for peace!

RadiantKristen said...

I have all of the things to say right now, but none of them seem right, except that I know that you are a truly exceptional woman, and that if you open yourself up to it, you have the capacity to do all things. Hang in there,sweet friend!

chenlina said...

chenlina20151209
replica watches
air max 95
ugg boots
coach factory outlet online
coach factory outlet
louis vuitton handbags
uggs on sale
polo ralph lauren
nike huarache shoes
air max uk
michael kors outlet
michael kors handbags
tory burch sale
ugg clearance
kids uggs on sale
canada goose coats
air max 90
ray ban sunglasses outlet
ray ban sunglasses outlet
coach outlet store online
kate spade handbags
ugg slippers
cheap uggs
oakley sunglasses cheap
ray ban sunglasses outlet
louis vuitton outlet
swarovski outlet
louis vuitton purses
jordan retro
louis vuitton outlet
michael kors outlet clearance
uggs on sale
toms outlet
louboutin pas cher
abercrombie and fitch
oakley outlet
ugg boots
cheap jordans
nike roshe run women
toms wedges
as

eric yao said...

Michael Kors Outlet http://www.michaelkorsoutlet.us.org

Coach Factory Outlet http://www.coachfactoryoutlet.us.org

Coach Outlet Online http://www.coachoutletonlinestore.us.org

Coach Purses http://www.coachpurse.us.com

Kate Spade Outlet http://www.katespadefactoryoutlet.us.com

Toms Shoes http://www.toms-shoes.name

Hermes Belts http://www.hermesbelts.us.org

Louis Vuitton http://www.louisvuitton-outletstores.us.com

Fendi Handbags http://www.fendibelt.us.com

Giuseppe Shoes http://www.giuseppezanotti.eu.com

Michael Kors Outlet http://www.michael-kors-outlet.us.com

Stephen Curry Shoes http://www.stephencurryshoes.us.com

Salomon Shoes http://www.salomonshoes.eu.com

North Face Outlet http://www.northfacesoutlet.in.net

Coach Outlet http://www.outletcoach.in.net

North Face Outlet http://www.northfacesoutlet.us.com

Burberry Outlet http://www.burberryoutletstore.us.org

North Face Outlet http://www.north-faceoutlets.in.net

North Face Jackets http://www.outletnorthface.in.net

Skechers Shoes http://www.skechersshoes.us.com

Toms Outlethttp://www.tomsoutletstore.us.org

North Face Outlet http://www.northfacestoreoutlet.us.org

Nike Air Max http://www.nikeoutlet.us.org

Nike Hoodies http://www.nikehoodies.us.com

Marc Jacobs Handbags http://www.marcjacobshandbags.name

Marc Jacobs Outlet http://www.marcjacobsoutletstore.us.com

Jimmy Choo Shoes http://www.jimmy-chooshoes.us.com

Jimmy Choos http://www.jimmychoos.in.net

Burberry Belt http://www.burberrybelt.us.com

Louis Vuitton Belt http://www.louisvuitton-belt.com

Salvatore Ferragamo http://www.ferragamo-belt.us.com

Marc Jacobs Handbags http://marcjacobshandbagsoutlet.blog.com

Lululemon Outlet http://www.lululemonsoutlet.us.com

True Religion Outlet http://www.truereligion-outlets.in.net

Tommy Hilfiger http://www.tommyhilfigeroutlet.us.com

Michael Kors Outlet http://www.outletmichaelkors.eu.com

Coach Outlet http://www.outletcoach.eu.com

Red Bottoms http://www.redbottom.in.net

Kevin Durant Shoes http://www.kevindurantshoes.us.org

New Balance Outlet http://www.newbalanceoutlet.in.net

Adidas Outlet http://www.adidasoutlet.in.net

Coach Outlet Online http://www.coachoutlet-online.eu.com

Stephen Curry Jersey http://www.stephencurryjersey.us.com

Vans Outlet http://www.vansoutlet.us.com

Ralph Lauren Outlet http://www.ralphlauren-outletstore.in.net

True Religion Outlet http://www.true-religionoutlets.in.net

ED Hardy Outlet http://www.edhardyoutlet.in.net

North Face Outlet http://www.northfaceoutlet.eu.com

UGG Outlet http://www.uggoutlet.us.org

UGG Outlet http://www.outletugg.in.net

North Face Outlet http://www.northface--outlet.us.com

Ugg Boots Sale http://www.uggbootssale.in.net

UGGS For Women http://www.uggsforwomen.us.com

Skechers Go Walk http://www.skechersgowalk.us.com

Adidas Yeezy Boost http://www.adidasyeezyboost.in.net

Adidas Yeezy http://www.adidasyeezy.us.com

Adidas NMD http://www.adidas-nmd.us.org

Coach Outlet http://www.coachoutletinc.us.com

Unknown said...

yeezy shoes
lacoste online shop
nike zoom
nike air force 1
james harden shoes
van cleef
golden goose sneakers
nike air max
hermes belts for men
hermes belt

오피 op-best.com said...


Took me time to read all the comments, but I really enjoyed the article. It proved to be Very helpful to me and I am sure to all the commenters here!
It’s always nice when you can not only be informed, but also entertained! 대구오피